Kept in the dark and fed on s***

Yep... for an excellent mushroom, keep it in the dark and feed it on excrement! That's how I feel my High Street dentist has treated me over the botched job of fitting a temporary veneer.

Why do I have to wait three weeks to have a new veneer fitted? Why do I have to go to Thame to let the technicians match up the shade to my existing teeth? Why did the temporary veneer turn black, thereby allowing me to frighten the horses and small children? Why did the subsequent visit to see another dentist (mine was away), result in her telling me that she thought the veneer was to blame, or I'd perhaps been using a certain brand of mouthwash, known for darkening teeth? Then, seeing my returning dentist, it seems my gum bled during the fitting of the temporary veneer, (due, by his own admission, to his clumsy extraction of the remains of the old one), and this caused the blackening under the veneer. So, off with the old, and on with a new one after being scraped and drilled and washed and dried. I'm now at home, with sore gum but a whiter tooth. My dentist doesn't do colour matches, nor tooth whitening, nor anything else out of the ordinary... he prefers to send his patients miles away for others to do the work. Could this be because he's not so hot in areas other than check-ups and extractions? His veneer work isn't so hot! When this treatment has finally finished I shall be seeking another Dentist.

At least he owned up to doing a bad job, unlike his young, straight out of the training school box, colleague who waffled her way through, did some poking around my blackened tooth saying she'd improved it, but when I asked for a mirror it was obvious she'd made the thing worse!

I feel better now, thank you blog friends for letting me vent steam. This is a mushroom unwilling to be kept in the dark and fed on shit!

More than one pebble on the beach

I'm still waiting to have my veneer replaced... hopefully soon so that I can smile with confidence once more... or at least give the impression I'm confident and 'ok'!

While waiting for whatever fate has in store, I have my granddaughter staying with me, and so, off to the Cinema to see the latest Harry Potter film ... which confused me, but delighted her; off to the local historical Manor Farm where she learnt how to make lace, split logs (the old-fashioned way) and make and dress dolly pegs. And, tomorrow we go to a Pottery shop where she will decorate a pot and have it 'fired' in a kiln. It's good to have someone around the house who is good company and who is fond of uttering things like, "Nana, I've put up the Aerosol"... she meant the Parasol! Yep, we had one day of reasonable sunshine.

While off out, down the lane in my car, I saw 'little amorous man' from the Gym. He was painting the outside of a house down the lane... my lane! Why does he keep turning up like a bad penny? He smiled and waved enthusiastically as I drove past. I smiled without showing my teeth! Then I thought, 'should've shown my chipped tooth; it may have put him off me for life...' which is, after all, what I want! Too late, he now knows I live somewhere along the lane. The time is coming soon when I shall have to tell him politely to bugger off.

On the road to ...?

I never knew just how long the road is to happiness! I'd be happy to know that my road led somewhere, or at least, hoped it would be as entertaining as the roads that Bob Hope, Bing Crosby and Dorothy Lamour took, all those years ago. Me? Haven't a bloody clue!

Today I went off in my car to Hughenden Manor just north of High Wycombe... the house of former Prime Minister, Benjamin D'israeli. I did the House tour... all one hour and a half of it... and learnt new things about this special man, all of which surprised me. He was a poor man's hero who had to endure endless taunts about his judaisism. Nevertheless, he was adored by Queen Victoria who visited his home two days after his funeral and insisted that a bouquet of china primroses was entombed with him.

I had thought to venture out to Oxford tonight... to buy a ticket to hear the 19 piece band, Blakes Heaven, at Oxford Castle. I phoned my daughter to see if she wanted to go, but she had had a hectic day at work and declined. Instead, I sat and watched a DVD... as usual, thinking that my life had come to a juddering halt. How I miss going out with someone close. I miss evening walks, talks and outings to Pubs; I miss talking to someone, linking my arm with someone and sharing a joke with someone. I think my life is on hold, paused, waiting for something... better to think that than be a complete pessimist and think that my life is over.

My horoscope says I am on the brink of a new life... all I can say is that it's a bloody big, long and wide brink!

Perhaps tomorrow will bring something new...

Up the garden path

More money needed! My front tooth veneer happened to split... my fault... I was trying to break cheap selotape with my teeth while in a hurry to wrap up my grandson's birthday present. Later when I discovered the damaged veneer, I looked everywhere for the piece of veneer in the hope it could be stuck back on... but I think it went with the present to the grandson and is now at the refuse tip stuck to the wrapping.

The dentist gave me a quote for a new veneer... £379!! Or, I could opt for a crown, he said. Nope, can't do that... the tooth isn't strong enough having undergone an Apesectomy years' ago... No, I don't know what an Apesectomy is either, just that it was painful and bears no relation to looking like an Ape, hmmm, well I don't think so...

Then there's the bill for the recent Heating problem and the bill for the recent car MOT... then there's the increased Electricity bill... how?? When I use tea-lights, hardly use the cooker or hob, keep the TV switched off and everything else switched off when not in use!!

I've developed a good coping mechanism for pushing all these things away... I go for a swim and then go out in my garden. I love brushing against the lavender to get to my front door. The Postman doesn't like it very much... was that a Machete I saw him with yesterday?

A Day out for an EGG

It seems we group of ex-green gymmers now have the name 'EGGS'... a good bunch... good eggs... adventurous and game for anything!

Yesterday, we went to Broughton Castle in north Oxfordshire. It being one of the few ancestral homes that still remains in the hands of the original family... Sele and Sayte. It had a really good, still lived-in feel about it, having escaped the trappings of that wonderful organisation; The National Trust.

Pictures of Oliver Cromwell adorned the walls, as did pictures of Queen Ann and others. Although the family sided with Cromwell, they quickly accepted the return of Charles II (as one would in difficult times). Original plated armour, leather buckets, swords, pikes and artefacts adorn the Castle and as I gazed out of this window before taking the picture, I could imagine the Cromwellian soldiers riding down the green sloping pasture land towards the Castle. I really wish, (along with thousands of others) that I could be an invisible time traveller. Ah... if only I could afford to enrol on an archaeology course! I just love digging in the dirt!

One of our team didn't come with us... she had been in contact with someone with Swine Flu and was beginning to develop symptoms...

I think I really must get my Will sorted!

Death from Application forms

Yesterday, I spent all the daylight hours trying to complete an online application form for a college lecturer's post at a college many, many miles away! Today, I ask why?

I lost the will to live several times throughout the day. No I can't remember the exact start and end dates of jobs ten years' ago. No, I don't have the post code of Southampton University; No, I didn't work between Dec 04 and now because it's no-one else's bloody business!

I came out of the web page, and was then sent a special code by email for me to resume the application form later! Neck and back aching from a badly positioned screen and chair, I sipped my extra strong coffee and asked myself out loud, "Do I really want to go back to being a Lecturer?" In my heart I heard a resounding 'No'. "Do I want to earn some money?" 'Yes'! So, what can I do to earn some money??

I asked two of my daughters to tell me honestly what my qualities and skills were - in their opinion - and told them not to hold back... even the negative thoughts would be good for me! Their responses surprised me; I was in tears... real, emotive tears. It was a defining moment... I had no idea they viewed me in the way they did!

There were no negatives... I seem to have qualities and skills I hadn't realised. Has it helped me decide what I want to do? No. I'm even more confused now.

I think this must be my second mid-life crises... and what I really must get my head around is the fact that it's okay to have these times, and that it's okay not to work, and it's okay to just potter around and do whatever my bank balance allows me to do.

Sod the application form... I'd rather take photos of my Hollyhocks!

Help for Heroes... indeed, more help needed!

It was a damp but humid Saturday evening when a few of us rallied round and set up food and refreshments in the Woodstock Town Hall ready for the group of 20 or so Royal Engineers who were cycling on a seven-seater contraption in order to raise money for a rehabilitation unit for their injured comrades.

No Mayor..., and no deputy Mayor... where were they? A few Town Councillors and several 'old' soldiers and their wives. I think there could have been a lot more support for such self-sacrificing men...

My daughter, granddaughter and myself served wine to all who required it. Perhaps due to the damp weather, or otherwise, there was not the huge welcome the men of the Royal Engineers deserved. Woodstock, a wealthy Cotswold town not far from Oxford, remained sleepily silent except for the excellent work of a few councillors and helpers who thoughtfully made an effort!

I sat in the Mayor's chair within the ancient Town Hall and was asked by someone (not a councillor) if I'd be interested in running for Mayor next year... No, I don't live in Woodstock... I was only helping out a friend for the evening! Methinks Woodstock needs to have a talk to some of its current Councillors... and who knows... maybe a new Mayor would bring fresh thoughts?!

What would I know!!