I have never, ever before seen a wild orchid, so when our group descended on the Old Woodstock Railway Line this Wednesday to conduct a survey, I was amazed at the number of orchids we found. I now know the difference between a Bee orchid and a Wasp orchid, as well as discovering three more rare varieties, one of which has not been recorded in Oxfordshire before. I didn't have a picture of an orchid, so instead have posted one of a rose called, 'In loving memory'.We are mostly a happy band of Green Gymmers who normally tolerate one another's foibles and idiosyncracies; and celebrated one year of 'being' by having a bar-b-que and quiz after completing the orchid survey.
I ended my day by going to the other Gym - pounding on the treadmill, then swimming with all my power until my heart thumped in my chest. Someone asked me recently if I managed to sleep now that I'm on my own. I sleep as if I have died... not waking until the cats sit on me or push their whiskery noses into my face, around seven thirty each morning.
I have recently spoken to two women (through the Green Gym), who have lost their husbands in the last two years, . They are not at the same stage as me - yet. So I encourage them to be patient and that soon they will start looking forward not back. Perhaps it's because of nearly three years of grief that I don't tolerate nasty people any more and will speak up for justice. Perhaps it's why I don't get upset about the little things any more and perhaps it's why I have more tolerance for the simple things in life. I no longer strive for better pay or material things. I smile at lovers and old people who still hold hands. My perspective on life has changed forever.
In loving memory...
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