Confused again

As I took off my jacket and handed it to the small, delicate, very blonde and very young assistant, she said, "That's it sweetie..." as she helped me on with my black voluminous gown in preparation for a cut and blow-dry! And with her delicate, butterfly touch on my elbow, she guided me to the chair. I suppose that to her, I was ancient and needed treating delicately. She handed me a couple of 'OK' and 'Hello' magazines, and as soon as she'd gone off to aide another ancient over-40 woman, I got up and exchanged them for 'Country Living' and 'Prima'... proof that I was indeed ancient!

Then conversely, yesterday while walking around the Cotswold Wildlife Park with my two young grandsons, and asking for two ice-cream cones, I was addressed as 'Mum' by the young man serving. I am now suffering from a sort of identity crisis... what am I? Ancient grandmother or mother of two young boys? What's age got to do with anything? And, why are some people ill at ease with the different ages? Or, do they just not know that everyone, regardless of age, etc., etc., should be treated with equal respect? I don't much like being called 'Sweetie, darlin', love, m'duck or anything else by people I don't know. However, some might say that I have indeed reached the 'Grumpy Old Woman' stage! All this is proof I need a life!

Can't see the wood for the trees...

I am tasked with the job of finding a suitable venue for my daughter's wedding next year! I am amazed at the inflexibility of some venues in that they will not, under any circumstances, provide a buffet-style wedding breakfast!! For Goodness sake... who is paying for this!!

I am google-eyed and websited out! Why can't they realise that the Bride's wishes are basically what provides their income? Today we visited three venues... the first - we were met by a lovely and very young lady who anticipated our every question and was absolutely great! Problem... no accommodation! Second vist to a small country hotel... the girl was just out of puberty and gave us a spiel but with no effort at encompassing the Bride's wishes... the third was a larger hotel and of a well-known brand who didn't mind doing whatever the bride wished. However, the rooms may not be entirely to my daughter's liking... and was the venue for a friends wedding. Difficult... and it brought back many memories for me because my lovely man and I stayed at the same hotel for her friends wedding back in 2004.

Venues vary in what they offer and some incur hidden charges for just the basics... like a cup of tea!

I am also feeling vulnerable because yet again, I will probably attend, as the bride's mother... alone and without a partner while my previous [Ex] will love that fact! My daughter said jokingly... maybe you will have a 27 year old muscled, tanned partner by then... we laughed, but I knew the reality was that I would still be alone.

Perhaps I could hire someone??

Meanwhile I continue on my websearch of suitable venues in Oxfordshire and maybe into Gloucestershire for somewhere where my lovely eldest daughter and her partner can be married in the manner to which they would like.

Kept in the dark and fed on s***

Yep... for an excellent mushroom, keep it in the dark and feed it on excrement! That's how I feel my High Street dentist has treated me over the botched job of fitting a temporary veneer.

Why do I have to wait three weeks to have a new veneer fitted? Why do I have to go to Thame to let the technicians match up the shade to my existing teeth? Why did the temporary veneer turn black, thereby allowing me to frighten the horses and small children? Why did the subsequent visit to see another dentist (mine was away), result in her telling me that she thought the veneer was to blame, or I'd perhaps been using a certain brand of mouthwash, known for darkening teeth? Then, seeing my returning dentist, it seems my gum bled during the fitting of the temporary veneer, (due, by his own admission, to his clumsy extraction of the remains of the old one), and this caused the blackening under the veneer. So, off with the old, and on with a new one after being scraped and drilled and washed and dried. I'm now at home, with sore gum but a whiter tooth. My dentist doesn't do colour matches, nor tooth whitening, nor anything else out of the ordinary... he prefers to send his patients miles away for others to do the work. Could this be because he's not so hot in areas other than check-ups and extractions? His veneer work isn't so hot! When this treatment has finally finished I shall be seeking another Dentist.

At least he owned up to doing a bad job, unlike his young, straight out of the training school box, colleague who waffled her way through, did some poking around my blackened tooth saying she'd improved it, but when I asked for a mirror it was obvious she'd made the thing worse!

I feel better now, thank you blog friends for letting me vent steam. This is a mushroom unwilling to be kept in the dark and fed on shit!

More than one pebble on the beach

I'm still waiting to have my veneer replaced... hopefully soon so that I can smile with confidence once more... or at least give the impression I'm confident and 'ok'!

While waiting for whatever fate has in store, I have my granddaughter staying with me, and so, off to the Cinema to see the latest Harry Potter film ... which confused me, but delighted her; off to the local historical Manor Farm where she learnt how to make lace, split logs (the old-fashioned way) and make and dress dolly pegs. And, tomorrow we go to a Pottery shop where she will decorate a pot and have it 'fired' in a kiln. It's good to have someone around the house who is good company and who is fond of uttering things like, "Nana, I've put up the Aerosol"... she meant the Parasol! Yep, we had one day of reasonable sunshine.

While off out, down the lane in my car, I saw 'little amorous man' from the Gym. He was painting the outside of a house down the lane... my lane! Why does he keep turning up like a bad penny? He smiled and waved enthusiastically as I drove past. I smiled without showing my teeth! Then I thought, 'should've shown my chipped tooth; it may have put him off me for life...' which is, after all, what I want! Too late, he now knows I live somewhere along the lane. The time is coming soon when I shall have to tell him politely to bugger off.

On the road to ...?

I never knew just how long the road is to happiness! I'd be happy to know that my road led somewhere, or at least, hoped it would be as entertaining as the roads that Bob Hope, Bing Crosby and Dorothy Lamour took, all those years ago. Me? Haven't a bloody clue!

Today I went off in my car to Hughenden Manor just north of High Wycombe... the house of former Prime Minister, Benjamin D'israeli. I did the House tour... all one hour and a half of it... and learnt new things about this special man, all of which surprised me. He was a poor man's hero who had to endure endless taunts about his judaisism. Nevertheless, he was adored by Queen Victoria who visited his home two days after his funeral and insisted that a bouquet of china primroses was entombed with him.

I had thought to venture out to Oxford tonight... to buy a ticket to hear the 19 piece band, Blakes Heaven, at Oxford Castle. I phoned my daughter to see if she wanted to go, but she had had a hectic day at work and declined. Instead, I sat and watched a DVD... as usual, thinking that my life had come to a juddering halt. How I miss going out with someone close. I miss evening walks, talks and outings to Pubs; I miss talking to someone, linking my arm with someone and sharing a joke with someone. I think my life is on hold, paused, waiting for something... better to think that than be a complete pessimist and think that my life is over.

My horoscope says I am on the brink of a new life... all I can say is that it's a bloody big, long and wide brink!

Perhaps tomorrow will bring something new...

Up the garden path

More money needed! My front tooth veneer happened to split... my fault... I was trying to break cheap selotape with my teeth while in a hurry to wrap up my grandson's birthday present. Later when I discovered the damaged veneer, I looked everywhere for the piece of veneer in the hope it could be stuck back on... but I think it went with the present to the grandson and is now at the refuse tip stuck to the wrapping.

The dentist gave me a quote for a new veneer... £379!! Or, I could opt for a crown, he said. Nope, can't do that... the tooth isn't strong enough having undergone an Apesectomy years' ago... No, I don't know what an Apesectomy is either, just that it was painful and bears no relation to looking like an Ape, hmmm, well I don't think so...

Then there's the bill for the recent Heating problem and the bill for the recent car MOT... then there's the increased Electricity bill... how?? When I use tea-lights, hardly use the cooker or hob, keep the TV switched off and everything else switched off when not in use!!

I've developed a good coping mechanism for pushing all these things away... I go for a swim and then go out in my garden. I love brushing against the lavender to get to my front door. The Postman doesn't like it very much... was that a Machete I saw him with yesterday?

A Day out for an EGG

It seems we group of ex-green gymmers now have the name 'EGGS'... a good bunch... good eggs... adventurous and game for anything!

Yesterday, we went to Broughton Castle in north Oxfordshire. It being one of the few ancestral homes that still remains in the hands of the original family... Sele and Sayte. It had a really good, still lived-in feel about it, having escaped the trappings of that wonderful organisation; The National Trust.

Pictures of Oliver Cromwell adorned the walls, as did pictures of Queen Ann and others. Although the family sided with Cromwell, they quickly accepted the return of Charles II (as one would in difficult times). Original plated armour, leather buckets, swords, pikes and artefacts adorn the Castle and as I gazed out of this window before taking the picture, I could imagine the Cromwellian soldiers riding down the green sloping pasture land towards the Castle. I really wish, (along with thousands of others) that I could be an invisible time traveller. Ah... if only I could afford to enrol on an archaeology course! I just love digging in the dirt!

One of our team didn't come with us... she had been in contact with someone with Swine Flu and was beginning to develop symptoms...

I think I really must get my Will sorted!