I had a long telephone conversation with a long-distance friend today, primarily on the subject of men! I am in a dilemma concerning the attentions of little amourous man at the Gym; he has increased his smiles and is now saying hello and nodding at me at every opportunity. I nod back and wonder what I should do. You see, I am now 'gagging' for some kind of physical attention - yep... good old sex! It's not easy to admit this. But there is a problem, which I discussed at length with my friend... I am not usually promiscuous and have actually only 'known' two men in the whole of my adult life. While I have a 'need', I don't want to hurt anyone, or use anyone, or make myself more vulnerable by inviting someone into my life. Heavy Gardening, Green Gymming, and swimming til I feel sick, are no substitute. So, what do I do?
I sit here writing about it, having my two cubes of dark 70% chocolate, a small glass of wine - unusual for me as I don't like it very much, and a handful of mixed nuts... pondering on what I should do.
There must me thousands of women like me... of all ages, who have a 'need' but are too refined and shy to do anything about it. Where are all the bloody, good-looking, fit, intelligent and caring men that we women so desperately need?
Dead?
Married?
Gay?
Non-existent?
Is there anyone out there who can provide answers????
Having said all that, I was dressing in the Gym tonight when I overheard two women talking about their husbands... all in their fifties. One said her husband refused to come to the Gym to try and shift his overhanging beer belly. The other said her husband said that if she didn't lose some weight, he would leave her. They went on at some length about the failings of their husbands which made me glad that I was single... but then my husband was neither of these and he was always complimentary, caring, tall, sexy and adored me. The two women should re-think their relationships, because they certainly don't have what I had.
In conclusion, I think I shall never have what I had with my husband, so should I just accept the attentions of amourous little men? Or, should I just give up wanting some kind of sexual relationship and find a chemist that supplies bromide?
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3 comments:
It must be something in the air - I'm feeling exactly the same...I think - it's been so long that I'm not even sure what feeling amorous feels like!
I'm also in the same position re lack of experience. I'm even getting advice from my son, who has way more experience (and partners) than I do!
You do wonder 'why not' when you think about uncomplicated sex. Everyone else seems to be doing it. Maybe you and I have a completely new future ahead of us, full of naughtiness and fun?
I had a conversation this morning with a friend who is having her first realization that there is sex after a lousy marriage, a realization that I came to a year ago, and we both decided that now we can be more relaxed because we are not interviewing men for husband positions. We are now beyond the lectures of society, since we heeded them long ago, and so now is the time to ease up and relax, and let sex be sex, which can be something that we do and enjoy; it does not have to be a precursor to anything else.
Laura
www.RebelliousThoughtsofaWoman.com
Laura and Puddock - you have just echoed my friend's views. According to her I should just enjoy sex with whoever I fancy and not think that there is anything else attached. My concern however, is that a man would quickly interpret great sex as a sign of being 'in love'... as they tend to do. Then comes the messy bit (excuse use of words), when the man in question likely has to be turned away, and from my limited experience this will either cause great distress or will bring about some strong possessive behaviour. As my friend pointed out to me... I tend to over-analyse and thing to much. I should just think like most men and enjoy the moment. I just have to get my head around the idea of free, uncomplicated sex for the sake of sex alone. Not easy for a puritanical, inexperienced woman brought up to be a good girl.
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